That’s the title of a Warren Zevon greatest hits album, I am not sure why but that has been sticking with me the past few weeks What is a quiet normal life? Does anyone really want one? If they do are they happy with it? Or are they really happy with it? and has the definition of normal changed over the years? I think of this as some people who read this know that I mostly thought I had such a thing until the last year or so. Kids were successful, not too boring, even little edgy was the youngest but really never gave us any problems. And then we were hit with the “I am not who you thought I was” by one of them. Wow, now what? And does it matter? Maybe a little, maybe a lot?
We get disrupted by life a lot, I have found even at my ripe young age of 54. Shouldn’t we accept that. Don’t we welcome differences. I don’t think we do, at least not as much as people like to say or even worse like to say they do. When I got divorced, most of the people I knew walked away. When I had life and parent and work issues at the same time, people were cautious or non existent. People don’t like change, they don’t like no matter what they say, differences. So your kid is gay? Trans? Some other form of sexual identity? Depressed? I hope you feel better and let me know what I can do. But usually they can’t. Kid doing great, we are all in.
So what do we do, and I am not sure even what I am trying to say here. But what I have found is that like people need each other. While we try and be empathetic(or sympathetic I always get these mixed up) how much do people really care if they cannot identify first hand. I recently met someone who life though a little far away, so closely mirrors mine it is downright weird. Gender issues and sexuality issues with her kids, jewish, smart but a little confused by life, and I fin myself for the first time in 14 long months really being able to genuinely laugh and look at life from a accepting view point that this is what it is. No one really has a quiet normal life so why not try and embrace that? But also accept that even if people try to become your weirdness into their world, don’t be upset when you know they really cannot.
It is like the saying opposites attract. Do they really?